Two Moderately Unsurprising Sub-par Fish Experiences

Sub-par Fish Experience #1: I tried the sushi at Lifetime Fitness so you don't have to

Most Mondays, my husband and I go to the gym and stop at the grocery store on our way home to get food for the week and practice a tradition I call "choose your own dinner," where we each choose something from the grocery store to eat for dinner. Typically, we get grocery store sushi because while I am elitist about some things, grocery store sushi is not one of them.

While we enjoy this tradition, we wanted to mix it up one week and opted to try the sushi restaurant inside our gym: the punnily-named Rare Sushi. Why is there a sushi restaurant inside the gym? Who knows! Our gym also has a woman who flosses her teeth in the sauna and a man who recommended someone take colloidal silver after getting bitten by a strange dog! (Colin did advise the bitten person to seek prompt medical attention.) A sushi restaurant is arguably the most normal thing happening at this gym.

We grabbed seats at the sushi bar and when our friendly server brought us waters, he informed us that it was happy hour. Jackpot! The normally $22 rolls would be just $15. I'll be honest - I don't remember which rolls we even ordered. They all tasted...fine. They were a little haphazardly-assembled and a lot of the pieces fell apart when we ate them, and the presentation was a bit messy.

The vibe was also unsurprisingly odd. Although it's a pretty large restaurant, there were only a few other people there: a literal child doing homework at the bar (I assume the kid of a staff member?) and one person at another table. It was very quiet, which made it a little uncomfortable. They did have these hilarious chopsticks, at least:

Since this experience, we have returned to our tried-and-true grocery store sushi and I don't anticipate visiting Rare Sushi again any time soon for multiple reasons:

1) If I want sushi with table or bar service, there is one better sushi restaurant within walking distance from the gym and another that's about a one-minute drive away.

2) While the quality at Rare Sushi was about the same as the grocery store, it became more expensive with the tip. The service was friendly and prompt and worthy of the tip, but the experience wasn't worth it to me.

3) It's weird that it even exists.

I do not recommend eating sushi inside Lifetime Fitness. (Duh?)

Sub-par Fish Experience #2: The poke at Costco in Minnesota is not as good as the poke at Costco in Hawaii

If you've ever been to Hawaii, you know that their Costco stores are a treasure trove of special local treats, including high-quality and reasonably-priced sashimi and poke. Imagine my surprise and delight when I saw a variety of pokes right next to the shrimp party trays at my own local Costco this week!

Instead of picking up the usual shrimp party tray, I decided to give their ahi wasabi poke a try. It looked fresh and flavorful.

I assembled poke bowls with a brown rice base, sprinkled some scallions on the top for good measure, and dug in. Unfortunately, the poke was really, really lacking in flavor. I had expected a hit of wasabi, sesame oil, or even salt! Nothing.

I added some spicy shichimi togarashi (Japanese seven spice) just so we could taste something, and it marginally improved. I was tempted to douse the whole thing in Kewpie mayo, but alas I have high cholesterol and Kewpie is probably the biggest culprit there. Thus we finished our bowls because I wasn't going to let nearly $18 go to waste. I might try a different variety of poke if they have it again next time. I guess I just have to keep chasing the high of how good Hawaii's Costco poke is forever...

I do not recommend eating Costco's Ahi Tuna Wasabi poke. (But I DO heartily recommend any and all raw fish and cooked shrimp preparations purchased at a Costco located in Hawaii.)